A Leg Report

By now I'm sure all 3 of my blog readers are sick of nothing but reports on my bum leg, but hey, it's the most exciting thing in my life right now!  Last week I called the doc to tell him that the two pain shots in the butt and the 3 pain meds he has me on are doing zilch for the pain.  If anything, I'm worse.  Today the doc's office finally returned my call.  They are referring me to an orthopedist and tripling the dose on one of my pain meds.  (I hope it's not the one that gives me a dry mouth!  I have to carry water with me because I get so dry that I choke when trying to talk.)

So that's the latest.  Once they process the referral, I'll call the orthopedist for an appointment.  I'm dreading how much this will cost, as I have no medical insurance.  On the other hand, I really want to get this thing fixed! 

At Last! A Diagnosis!

Saw the doctor yesterday and finally (FINALLY!) have a diagnosis for the cause of my leg and back pain:  herniated disk, sciatica, and a pinched nerve in my hip (meralgia paresthetica).  I have a list of back exercises to do, three prescriptions for (1) pain, (2) inflammation, and (3) spasms, and a couple of shots in the butt for immediate pain relief.  (Though I have to admit that 13 hours later I'm still not feeling much pain relief.)
However, I did get a good pun out of the butt shots.  The nurse had just given me the first shot in the left cheek when I asked her if she wanted me to "turn the other cheek."  It made her laugh.  This was one of the few times I actually thought of a pun right away instead of an hour later. 

Anyway, the doc discussed options with me.  He wanted to order an MRI, but I haven't any medical insurance and can't afford the $4,000 for the MRI, so that is not an option.  He also wanted to refer me to a bone specialist, but again, the new doc will want an MRI. So I'll do my back exercises, continue to lose weight, take my meds, including increased amounts of B-6, B-12, and Folic Acid (all of which I'm already taking).  And in another year I'll be 65 and on Medicare, so if things haven't improved by then, at least I'll have Medicare.

I'm just glad I finally have a diagnosis and a list of things I can do to help me get better.

One More Leg Update

Getting tired of me talking about my leg all the time?  Well, me too.  As I write this, I am in considerable pain.  The leg is really bad today.  So bad that even using crutches is painful.  Both my feet are swollen.  And the right leg aches like a seriously bad toothache, only ten times worse.   The pain pills and aspirin only take the edge off, but don't knock out the pain.  Despite the fact the doc didn't find anything wrong when I had the ultrasound, I'm going to make another appointment.  We simply HAVE to get to the bottom of this!  I can't continue like this.  Standing alleviates the pain as long as I put my weight on the other leg, but after awhile, the good leg starts to ache from the constant strain.  Sitting is downright painful.  Lying down helps, but I can't live my life flat on my back.  Driving is excruciating. 

Today I am hobbling around like a cripple.  I've been doing leg stretching exercises and they only seem to make it worse.  I'm not overdoing the exercises, but yesterday I did some mild hamstring stretches and today I can barely walk.  So I'm going to make yet another appointment with the doc and ask for X-rays.  Maybe that will show something that the ultrasound didn't.  In the meantime, I've become extremely grumpy from the pain.

But there's good news.  I've now lost 13 pounds.  I've lots more to lose, but at least I'm losing!

Leg Update #3

Break out the Band-Aids!  I spoke too soon.  My leg pain is coming back.  It is just the most bizarre thing!  Now the entire leg is involved, from buttock/hip to foot.  Sitting for longer than 5 minutes is painful, and driving a car is excruciating (it's my right leg, so pressing on the brakes or gas pedal makes things worse.)  I now drive with my body twisted so that my weight is on my left hip and butt, to relieve pressure on the bad leg.  I look weird, but hey, it works!  Sort of.

I've lost 12 pounds, and have tons more to lose, but I'm sure that losing weight will help.  Or at least keep things from getting worse.  Now I have to get up and walk around some more.  Sayonara!

Leg Update #2

Well, the results are in.  It is not a blood clot.  It is not deep vein thrombosis.  That's what it isn't.  They do NOT know what it is.  Nor, apparently, do they care, especially since the leg is getting better on its own.  I love the medical system.  They called to tell me no blood clots and no thrombosis, and got ready to hang up. 

I went, "Whoa, wait a minute here.  We aren't done.  I've been in intense pain for over two months, been on crutches and painkillers, been incapacitated.  Shouldn't we dig a little deeper to find out WHAT is causing all this pain, so that I can keep it from happening again?  And what exercises or therapy should I be doing?"  The nurse was nonplused.  After all, I was getting better.  The problem was going away on its own.

It was my turn to be nonplused.  Just because I'm getting better doesn't mean we can now ignore the previous months of pain, or the fact that for the past two years I've had more and more bouts of intermittent pain.  I guess these questions will remain unanswered.  Wonderful medical system we have, eh?

So I'm going to lose weight, as I'm sure that's a factor.  I'm being careful about the leg, trying to avoid doing anything that will cause a flare-up.  I sleep with a pillow between my knees (have for years).  I'm taking aspirin when the pain flares up.  I'm not overdoing things--no more long hours on my feet doing spring housecleaning or house painting beyond the pain threshhold. Without a diagnosis, that's all I can do.  Plus, I'm staying away from banana peels.

Leg Update

I saw the doc last week regarding my bum leg, and yesterday I went in for ultrasound to "rule out a blood clot."  Of course, they won't tell you the results of the ultrasound.  You have to get that from your own doc.  The ultrasound lady told me that my doc would have the results of the ultrasound in a couple of days, so I'm expecting a phone call by the end of the week.

In the meantime, the doc gave me some pain pills, so I'm off crutches for now, thank goodness.

Bum Leg

The past 45 days have been interesting.  For some reason, I ended up with a bum right leg.  I suspect part of the reasonn is my persistent meralgia paresthetica (pinched nerve) in my thigh, but that doesn't explain the knee and calf pain. Sitting is painful.  Walking is painful.  Standing is painful.  Driving is excruciating because of the pressure on the back of the thigh from sitting.  Lyng down does help a little.

When you live alone, there's nobody to fetch and carry for you.  Nobody to bring you a glass of water or cook your dinner or drive to the grocery store.  So resting the leg is difficult--thus the borrowed crutches and the standing saddle stool (more on the stool, below).

Never one to rush into things, I thought I'd take a wait and see attitude and let Mother Nature do some healing.  Apparently Mother Nature was on vacation, because she totally ignored me, and the pain got so bad that I'm now on crutches.  I also bought one of those standing saddle stools, and I zoom all around the house in it, which has helped take the weight off my bad leg. These stools are designed with a seat that looks like an English saddle, so that when you sit in them, your legs hang down from the hips, not from the knees.  This takes pressure off the back of the thighs and keeps the hips in a more open position.

I have an appointment with the doc in a few days to get a diagnosis and to see if they can get me back to normal.  In the meantime, just call me "gimp."

It's State Fair Time!

On Friday, September 10, my sister Lori and I went to the Puyallup Fair (formerly called the Western Washington Fair).  We went on opening day, a mistake we will not repeat, as it was a mob scene, with throngs of people packed into the 169 acres like sardines.  Eventually the crowds thinned out, however.

The Puyallup Fair is the 8th largest fair in the world, and is over a century old, having begun in 1900.  It runs for 17 days and attendance always tops 1 million.  It's so huge that you can't see it all in one day.  It starts off with an old fashioned cattle drive right down the main street of Puyallup, with the cattle being driven to the fairgrounds by cowboys mounted on cowhorses. The cattle don't always go where they're supposed to.  Last year, one steer did his imitation of a bull in a china closet by taking a detour through a drug store, with the amiable steer going in one door and startled patrons erupting out the other door.

This year, I tried to talk my sister into going on some rides with me, but she declined.  So the only ride I went on was the Giant Slide.  That's me on the far left.  I screamed all the way down.  It was a blast, but climbing the five million steps to the top just about did me in.  The stairs are on the right of the slide, behind the orange barrier.

Everyone is so friendly at the fair. Complete strangers will laugh and joke with you as you wait in line for rides or share inadvertent elbow bumps and toe stomps. I love being totally immersed in the whole experience. It’s a sensory overload of the best kind—crowds of people, food smells, calliope music from the carousel, screams from the fairway rides, cheers from the rodeo grandstand, mooing cows, baaing sheep and goats, crowing roosters, the thunder on the pavement as 6-horse hitches of Clydesdales rumble by, hucksters hawking their wares, the diesel smell from the farm tractors/agricultural equipment demos, the bright and twinkling lights from the brilliantly gaudy fairway . . . Lord, how I love state fairs!

The Summer That Wasn't

For the first time in many years I had a large veggie garden this year.  Below is a picture of part of the terraced garden in front of the basement.  I was diligent, starting my seeds indoors and transplanting them early.  They started off promisingly.  In April we were blessed with unseasonably hot weather, and the garden took off.  And then summer came.

At least the calendar said it was summer.  You couldn't tell it by the weather.  We'd have a few hot days, and then the clouds would move in and the skies would turn gray.  So my garden's been growing in fits and starts.  Once, we had almost two weeks of hot weather, but then it turned cold again and everything quit growing.

And so it's been, all summer.  My corn is 5' tall, but has only begun to tassel.  I probably won't get any corn this year.  My tomatoes, on the left side of the picture, are tall and vigorous and loaded with tomatoes--all of them green.  I have 6 large tomato plants, and so far, have harvested less about a dozen ripe tomatoes, most of them cherry tomatoes.  My summer squash is barely producing, and my acorn squash is so late that it hasn't even begun to blossom yet.  My sugar snap peas are a joke.  You can see them lying anemic on the ground in front of the tomatoes My green beans, however, are doing great and I've been eating beans for weeks.  The broccoli is just starting to form heads, and my cabbage and Brussels sprouts are iffy. 

The only thing that grew immediately, and fast, was my radish crop.  I had to pull them up and toss them, as they were all wormy.  I'm never growing radishes again.  My carrots are still infants.  My Walla Walla sweets aren't even adolescents, though the jalapeno pepper plant--the only one I planted because I bought it by mistake at the nursery--is growing like crazy.  When I bought it, I thought it was a green pepper plant.  My other green peppers are sickly.  My cucumbers haven't a single blossom yet.  My parsley, on the other hand, is growing like gangbusters.

All in all, we've had an absolutely lousy growing season for veggie gardens.  I'd bought a canning and freezing book this year, anticipating canning and freezing all my produce.  Guess I'll put the book away.   I certainly won't have anything to preserve this year! 

Stopping the Nonsense

Retailers:  can we please just make life easier and stop all these stupid rewards/loyalty programs?  The ones I'm talking about are the stores that won't give you discounts unless you have one of their rewards or loyalty cards.  Everybody does it, from grocery stores to pet stores, from bookstores to hardware stores, from shoe stores to sandwich shops.  Either you get a discount at the register, or you accumulate points and they mail you a rewards check.  On some cards, you accumulate points toward air miles or get a discount on gasoline.   

I hate these things.  They take up room in my purse.  I have 12 of them in a little plastic pouch that I carry in a pocket of my purse, for easy access. (That's a picture of my rewards cards, above)  Most of these cards are free, but you are asked to give your phone number and other personal info when you sign up.  That way, if you're at the register and forgot your rewards card, you can just tell the cashier your phone number, while everyone else in line hears you giving out your unlisted number.

Why not just mark down the retail items for everyone, and do away with the rewards programs? Why must we add yet one more point of inconvenience to our already busy lives?  Well, one reason why is that retailers can track your purchasing habits with these cards.  The cards help them accumulate demographics--where you live, how often you shop, which brand of soda pop you purchase, how much you spend on each trip, and even how old you are.  According to Wikipedia, these rewards programs "are structured marketing efforts that reward, and therefore encourage, loyal buying behavior — behavior which is potentially of benefit to the firm."

I realize demographics help retailers plan their futures, develop targeted marketing programs, and even issue coupons based on your buying habits.  But they're still a nuisance.  They are an invasion of privacy.  They clutter my life.  They annoy the living daylights out of me.

Advanced K9 Behavior

Yesterday, August 14, I graduated from the Advanced K9 Behavior course at the Kitsap Humane Society, where I volunteer as a dog trainer/dog walker and cat cuddler.  This advanced course is geared toward training problem dogs and turning them into model canine citizens. Sort of like charm school for dogs, if you will.  Dogs completing the K9 Charm School will be made available for adoption at a higher adoption fee, since they will be so well trained.  Part of the higher adoption fee will cover the cost of training the new owner, who will be required to take training along with their dog.  It's a win/win for both dog and new owner.

I'm part of a pilot program for this K9 Charm School.  It's exciting to see such wonderful programs going on at the humane society, and to know there are dedicated animal lovers willing to give of their free time to benefit the animals in the shelter.  There were 20 volunteers who graduated from this advanced class, and we will begin training select problem dogs next Saturday.  We're using the buddy system, as most training sessions will include the problem dog and a laid-back, non-combative dog, which will be the "target" dog when retraining dog-aggressive dogs (it's why we need 2 trainers--one to handle the aggressive dog and one to handle the target dog.)

When I signed on as a volunteer, I told myself I was NOT going to get carried away and volunteer for more work than my self-alotted volunteer hours per week, nor get roped into extra stuff.  So much for willpower.  I can see where this new program is going to add greatly to my volunteer hours, as well as my car mileage, so I have to be careful not to take on more than I can handle.  I'm feeling a little pressured to take on more, but will hold firm.  I can't really spend hours and hours on my feet because of significant arthritis in both feet, so that'll be a self-limiting thing.  

I used to show and train dogs about 35 years ago, and training sure has changed a lot since then!  And it's all for the good!

Dougie MacLean Visits the Word Wenches

On Monday, July 26, Susan King of the Word Wenches will interview Scottish music legend, Dougie MacLean. MacLean has a large following in the UK, Australia and the US. He performed "The Gael" from Last of the Mohicans and also "Caledonia." (I have the soundtrack from Last of the Mohicans and "The Gael" is one of my favorite pieces.)  Monday's interview will center on MacLean's deep interest in history, so he'll fit right in with the Wenches! Join us on Monday for a little bit about Celtic music and a lot about history!  Here's the link:  http://www.wordwenches.com/

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

So last night I was painting the house, and decided to knock off for the night, as it was getting dark.  I was quite high up on an extension ladder, painting the second story with a roller on an extension pole.  It felt like I was 40 stories up.  Descending a ladder from that height is an interesting proposition.  For one thing, ladders are built for tall people.  I'm short.  As I descend, I hang onto the ladder in a death grip and lower one leg, groping with the tip of my toe, certain I'll never be able to reach the next rung.  It's that way all the way down to the ground.  The gaps between rungs are not easy to navigate for a short person.

Since I live alone and I know that accidents can happen, I take my phone with me.  It's not a cell phone--just a cordless phone.  I figure if I fall, God forbid, I'll at least be able to call 9-1-1.  But I don't have pockets in my jeans, and besides, if I fell, I'd probably land on the phone and break it, so instead, I put the phone in a baggie and place it on the ground at the base of the ladder.  I figure if I fell, I'd be able to reach the phone and make my call.

So there I am, descending from the heights of an extension ladder, when suddenly my shoe gets caught and I can't move it.  What the . . .?  I look down, and of all things one of my shoelace had managed to impale itself on a tiny wire connected to the giant hook thingies that lock the extension part of the ladder in place.  I can't reach my shoe to unlace it, and the shoelace is thoroughly impaled (the wire went through the lace, like a safety pin).  I can't go up or down.  I can't wriggle the shoe enough to get the lace untrapped.  I can't even get my foot out of the shoe because just that morning, knowing I was going to be going up and down ladders, I laced my shoes nice and tight. 

I'm stuck.  And it's getting dark.  And my phone is on the ground.  And it's starting to rain.  Great.

But determination is my middle name.  Clinging to the ladder like a monkey, I wriggled and wriggled my foot and eventually managed to slip out of the shoe.  I then descended the ladder with one shoe on and one shoe off.  Now that was a painful experience!  A bare foot on a narrow rung just isn't fun.  However, once the shoe was eye level  where I could use my hands, I managed to work the shoe loose and take it down the rest of the way with me. 

I can hardly wait to find out what happens next time I climb up a ladder.

My Favorite Cartoon

I'm deep in the throes of house painting, so this will be a very short post just to let everyone know I'm still alive.  One of my favorite cartoons was sent to me by a friend years ago, and I believe (but not sure) that it is from the New Yorker magazine.  Alas, I can't read the signature of the cartoonist, but it may be Mort Gerberg, whose cartoons always make me laugh.  At least it looks somewhat like his signature.  He used to have cartoons in the New Yorker.  I Googled his name, but couldn't determine if it was his cartoon or not.  I hope the copyright gods will give me an "E" for effort.  I do care very much about protecting copyrights.

It makes me giggle every time I see it.  In years gone by, many fancy restaurant waiters began visiting tables with a pepper mill, asking if you wanted freshly ground pepper on your salad and such.  Over the years, the pepper mills these waiters brandished started getting larger and more preposterous.  I almost became afraid of saying, "No, I don't want any pepper," for fear the waiter would club me with his oversized pepper mill.  (Thankfully, I adore pepper and always said, "Yes!" when asked)

Without further ado, here is the cartoon in question.  I hope it gives you a giggle.  And if anyone knows who I should credit, please let me know so that I can give proper attribution.

Volunteering at the Humane Society

Last month I decided to become a volunteer at the Kitsap Humane Society.  I've gone through extensive training, and now I am a Dog Walker and Cat Cuddler.  Yes, those are official titles.  Walking those dogs is not an easy task. The dogs are so eager to get out and stretch their legs and go potty that they drag you everywhere.  My first time Dog Walking I could hardly move the next day.  But I'm getting better at it, especially now that I've learned to alternate the "pullers" with the easy-to-walk dogs (of which there are few).

I'm really impressed by the Kitsap H.S. objectives.  They care deeply for the dogs and cats in their care.  They do all in their power to rehabilitate "bad" dogs and turn them into good canine citizens.  They only euthanize animals that are so ill they cannot be cured, or if the dog is so vicious it cannot be trained. 

Many of their animals have been there for over a year, so these walks in the woods for the dogs and petting and lap time for the cats are the brightest spot in their day.  And we don't just walk the dogs.  We train them.  They invest a lot of time in making the dogs adoptable.  Almost all the training is done by volunteers who have gone through considerable training themselves.  I used to show dogs, so I have a background in dog training already.  But training methods have changed in the 30 years since I showed dogs. Everything is positive reinforcement.  No dogs are punished. It's remarkable how well the dogs respond to positive reinforcement.

Since 85% of the dogs at KHS are pit bulls or pit bull mixes, training is important.  They're one of the few humane societies in our area that accept pit bulls.  Other humane societies send us their pit bulls, and we live in an area with a high pit bull population, so training is doubly important for these dogs.  KPS has a Great Eight program, where dogs that have been there for more than 8 months have their adoption fee cut in half.  They also have asimilar Nine Lives program for their long-term cats.  In addition, these long-time residents get to go home with volunteers for short "vacations" so that they get a break from cage life. 

I'm feeling very good about the work I'm doing with KHS.  It's rewarding.  And everyone rejoices when a dog or cat gets adopted.  Now, if we could just educate the public on the importance of neutering and spaying, there wouldn't be a need for humane societies . . .